The Truth About Friendship!

                          

 By Taiwo Odumala

"In these past years, I have learnt that the makings of great friendships can be found to be the makings of great men. Friendship closes age gaps, blurs racial boundaries and blinds ethnic diversities. True friendship transcends physical differences and social strata."

  

                                     

Once again, I failed to meet Kolapo’s deadline on stories in the past two weeks, so I decided to write this one. As much as I hate deadlines, I had to come through this time; not just for Kolapo or you guys but also for myself. 

It’s been a while I wrote. So this is about something I’ve really come to cherish.

The past few years has really been an eye-opener for me and it has taught me to cherish one of the best things in life, one of the best forms of human connection and social living; the act of friendship.

I remember the Guinness advert, the one of Udeme, “my friend who is a great man”. Udeme is a man who grew up with dreams to one day fly a plane in his own village. Udeme is a man who achieved his dream because a great man needs greater friends. 

Udeme got to fly his plane and after a hard day’s work, under the shiny night stars, he would hang out with his friends and share their favourite drink. Every night, they’d celebrate the successes from hard work and the beauty of great friendships.

Perhaps, Guinness was a bit ambiguous with that advert!

Looking at something similar, a few months ago, Airtel’s marketing slogan was “padi na good thing”, an ad showing an aspiring young singer who due to hard work, persistence, and with the help of his friends becomes a mega star. The young man succeeds because he not only had friends who helped him achieve his goals but because he had friends, who believed in him and as such, defined by their actions, what true friendship is.

They were there for him!

According to Henry Ford, “My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me” and to John Lennon, “I get by with a little help from my friends.” 

What then is friendship?

Friends to you may be a ‘collection’ of people who are handy at a particular point in time, perhaps because a particular circumstance has thrown you all together. Friendship to some is having someone or a group of people to chat or party with. For yet others, friendship is the option of belonging to a certain group who share same likes and goals with them.

For me, I have discovered that friendship is about making the right choices of people, of choosing those who will permanently influence you to be better. Friendship is about selecting those who will help you grow in life and who will also grow with you; people who will continually motivate you to succeed, who will continually chide you when you stop trying. They are the people who though like you are human and at certain points in life, will be weak; they will remain enduring because they know that strength lies in resilience.

Friends are people who will help you in reflecting, who will let you make your own decisions and when they see you going wrong, they get in your way even though it angers you. Friends are those who though may not shed your tears with you, they would however be there to pass you a handkerchief. Literally, to me, friendship is about those who see you as more than just another person, they see themselves in you.

In these past years, I have learnt that the makings of great friendships can be found to be the makings of great men. Friendship closes age gaps, blurs racial boundaries and blinds ethnic diversities. True friendship transcends physical differences and social strata.

In these past few months, I have met people who opened my eyes to what the horizons of friendship can be if only one can expand it. These people see me as their equal and give me due respect as a person because I respect them too.

In more ways than one, they have walked in my shoes. They have heard my frustrations and when shit happens, rather than disappear, they hand me the toilet paper, stand by while I clean up, to make sure I get it right. With them, I have been able to explore my possibilities and take careful chances. They have helped me learn to appreciate my humanness and humanity; to accept my weaknesses and channel my strengths.

More importantly, they have helped me to realize that writing can be a description of me if only I can find words to colour the pages. For me, friends are an extension of myself.